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No strings ( married ok). Funny how you always said that.

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And to think, last week I Ho about inflation. The chicks who say the above line always have a lot in common: But the main thing is this: You see, these bitches will never close their legs, but they have to pretend otherwise. Because they have a boyfriend. I wish you'd have known me three years ago, back when I was slut.

The moral here is that no one ever used to be a slut.

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Sluts may be made not born but they never convert to prude. That's just the way the world works.

Women tend to use this line while claiming to be hungry or while fighting to quit smoking. This one suts pretty self-explanatory. If a chick says she needs something in her mouth right now, it doesn't take much of a leap of logic to come to the conclusion that she's really eager to display her fellatio prowess.

When I hear women say this, I usually try to stick my fist in their mouths, which breaks the ice, Finding sluts to fuck in Maryland pa them laugh, and gives me an idea of how wide their mouths can open.

It took me years of fucking before I realized that sometimes the best way to get a slut into the hurry-up offense is to out-slut Marylnd. But I figured it out.

And there's a lesson there, kids anyone who figures out that lesson wins a free… something Court Sullivan owns. When I hear a chick ask if her friend can come with us, I make sure of two things before saying yes: What can I say?

Please note that this does not always mean threesome. Ah, chicks who show off new underwear or new breast implants: Almost always between 18 and 24 years old or total strippers Finding sluts to fuck in Maryland pa, almost always drunk or strung out, in the case of strippersand totally willing to fuck the guy who can seem the most aloof and disinterested in whatever skin is being Marylane.

Findkng be fucking in no time. No one, in any social gathering ever, needs to talk to another human being for twenty full minutes.

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Twenty minute conversations are for life-changing stuff Findinf setting up retirement funds and organizing mass graves. Oh, and girls who bribe guys into having sex with them: I mean, you know we'd usually do it anyway, right?

Why are we still standing here? Women, for whatever reasons, try to hide what raging sluts they are which is funny when you consider that they almost never try to hide what crazy bitches they can bebut whatever.

They hide their slut-ness in specific lines that a discerning male can easily translate. I am a discerning male, and so I have translated some of their codes into their original meaning in my ever-reaching quest to explain to the male population that most women are dirty, dirty whores. W omen are inherent liars.

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Unlike men, they do not lie about things that matter like how much they bench press and how much they can drink in one sitting. No, women lie to hide their true intentions.

They lie to hide what sluts they are.

You see, there's a language that sluts use to let the typical depraved male know exactly when they are down to fuck. Here now is an incomplete list of some of the things that whores say when they want to fuck.

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The world also works with oral fixations. Speaking of my old friend, Sully… 3. Speaking of time… 5.

Speaking of doing it anyway and doing it right… 6. Like I said, there's no need to thank me.

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